Archive for the ‘About Me’ Category

Cookies for Santa

December 25, 2010

The cookies are out, chocolate chip.  They’re Santa’s favorite you know! ;)  And a special carrot for the reindeer.  Oh yeah, and milk.  Can’t forget the milk.  It’s all ready and waiting.  We had one VERY excited little girl at bedtime tonight.  I would say that Holden is excited too, but he just doesn’t get it yet.  Kasen very carefully picked out the plate and the cup for Santa.  I love her confidence in making decisions.  She picked them right away, and never wavered . . . even though she had about 10 cups to choose from.  That girl, she definitely knows what she wants.  Then she clenched those little fists together and held them up to her cheeks, and in the highest voice imaginable, she squealed, “I’m so excited!” LOL  Even after she went to bed, she heard Brad and I in the kitchen.  She called for us and was quite concerned that if we didn’t hurry up and go to bed, that Santa wouldn’t come.  He knows that Mommy and Daddy have to be asleep too for the magic to happen.  Oh the magic, isn’t it wonderfu?! :D

Even though I’m super excited to see my little one’s faces in the morning, see their surprise to know that Santa came and left lots of presents, to hear their joy while singing “Happy Birthday” to Jesus before we eat His birthday cake, I still imagine those who are not doing all those things. :(  It wasn’t too long ago, that it was us . . . . imagining, praying, waiting for these moments.  For us they came, for others they didn’t, and that still breaks my heart.  I’ve been listening to lots of Christmas music, since even before Thanksgiving.  Yes, I’m one of those people, I just love it! LOL  One of my favorite songs is from Amy Grant called “My Grown-Up Christmas List” and the line that brings tears to my eyes every single time, is “And time would heal all hearts.”  *tears*  I love this verse too, “Well heaven surely knows, That packages and bows, Can never heal, A hurting human soul.”  Here’s the link to the song: “Grown-Up Christmas List” I used to listen to this song every Christmas and wonder if my heart would ever heal, especially after losing Halle.  Honestly, it hasn’t.  That doesn’t mean that I don’t enjoy my life, but my heart still hurts, it still aches that her stocking isn’t being filled every Christmas Eve, that I don’t get to see those sparkling eyes on Christmas morning, and hear her laughter while enjoying all her new presents.  It does mean that I’m super grateful for my two littles here on earth, that I can hardly sleep because I’m so excited to see their sweet faces in a few hours, that I love them so much my heart hurts . . . . in a good way. :)

Christmas means that I remember. I enjoy. I miss. I appreciate. I hurt. I anticipate. I love.  My heart is twisted in a million different ways, longing for what should have been, and happy for my blessings.

Merry Christmas!!  I hope that all your wishes come true!


Wow, it’s been so long since I’ve blogged, I almost didn’t know how to log back on here. ;)  We are in the Christmas rush getting everything ready like many families I know.  But we added one more HUGE thing onto our list this December.  We decided to take a trip to Disney World in the middle of it all.  And yes, I would do it again in a heartbeat.  It really was magical.  Brad and I took Kasen by ourselves.  Holden hung out with his Mae Mae and Papa; and I’m pretty sure they loved spending time with him as much as he adored all that attention.

As for Disney World, it was just incredible.  Maybe because I’ve never been before, ever.  Or maybe it was seeing all that magic through our little girl’s eyes.  Tears welled up in my eyes more times than I can count . . . . watching Kasen see the Magic Kingdom for the first time and yelling in the bus, “There’s the castle!!  There’s the castle!”  Seeing her eyes light up when Ariel and Princess Jasmine each blew her a kiss from the floats they were riding on in the parade.  Hearing Kasen’s screams of delight on the roller coaster and hearing her say, “Again. Again. Let’s do it again, and again. and again.” LOL  Watching her face gleam as she saw herself for the first time, all dolled up at the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique – she had enough glitter for several fairies. ;)  Following her down Main Street while she twirled and twirled in her Princess Ariel dress.  Listening to her gasp as she watched the fireworks and saw Tinkerbell fly over her head.  Amazed at her excitement when we met the Princesses for dinner at Cinderella’s Royal Table, oh, and the dance she did with Cinderella and the curtsies, that was beyond cute.  Laughing when she did her famous impression of “Arghhhhh” for Captain Hook and then her surprise when Peter Pan showed up at the end of the Pirate Cruise.  Her wonderful laughter at Cirque Du Soleil when as she puts it, “The funny guys in the white suits kept bumping into stuff.”  The jumping and laughing as the fake snow fell in Downtown Disney, as she yelled, “It’s snowing. It’s snowing.”  And the one that got me every.single.time – watching my husband holding Kasen on the balcony of our hotel, all wrapped up in a huge blanket, watching the fireworks every night.  It was the perfect ending to every wonderful, fantastic day filled with adventures, fun, and most of all, love.  I couldn’t have asked for more.  It was much needed for all of us.  I’m already planning our next trip back! ;)

Yes, I have lots of pictures, hopefully I’ll get to share them soon.  But for now, I have to share our Santa pic this year.  As you can see, Holden still isn’t fond of the big guy . . . maybe next year. :)  Kasen was as sweet and princessy as ever, gotta’ love her! :D


See ya’ later!!

One Quick Silly Pic

October 15, 2010

Here’s our silly girl with her new tooth (pretend of course)!  She says she looks like Nanny McPhee. ;)  Well, it was better than the Dracula teeth – glad she didn’t win those! LOL


On another note, I wanted to thank all of my friends for their offers and helping out with childcare while I’m dealing with this pinched nerve.  It could not be more appreciated.  I did have my MRI Thursday morning and since Holden was sick, Brad stayed home from work to watch him while I had my appointment.  I can totally see how people get claustrophobic in those things.  I just closed my eyes and tried to have happy thoughts.  Thank goodness for loud music and headphones.  I’ve had an MRI on my knee, but this was totally different being put in that tube.  I kept thinking I was in a Grey’s Anatomy episode and people were looking at my spine, getting excited while they tried  to decipher how they were going to operate. LOL  Being so still for over 30 minutes made my arm and hand feel even more numb than usual.  It made for an even harder night than I usually have too.  I couldn’t go to sleep because of the pain and then I was up at 2:30 a.m. reeling from how much my arm/neck/shoulder hurt.  I finally passed out around 6:30 a.m. and then wouldn’t you know it, Kasen was up at 7:00 a.m.  The sleep deprivation is killing me.  It’s not like I can even take a nap when I have two little ones depending on me.  After more than two weeks of this, I really hit my wall yesterday. :(

Now that I’ve had my x-rays and my MRI, I will have another appointment with my doctor on Tuesday to see exactly what is causing all of this pain.  I begged him to help me last week and I think I’ll cry this time if he doesn’t give me some hope.  My left shoulder was hurt a few years ago, but nothing can compare to this pain.  I was sobbing in the car today on the way home from Kasen’s Mothers’ Day Out program, and Kasen said, “Mommy, I’m SOOO sorry that you’re hurting so badly.”  Awwww, my sweet girl.  Okay, after all that talk and just that little bit of typing, I’m done – off to get my ice pack and just pray that someday soon I’ll get some pain free sleep.  I hope I never take that for granted again!

See ya’ later!!


October 11, 2010

Will be back soon hopefully to post pics.  I can hardly move without intense pain (I’m thinking pinched nerve) and there have been tears.  Many, many, many tears.  It’s been going on for almost two weeks now and I finally have a doctor’s appt. tomorrow.  I’m praying he can help.  I don’t think I can take another day like this, or another night of only 3-4 hours of sleep. :(

See ya’!!


March 7, 2010

Sorry I’ve been missing in action.  I have been sick, really sick for a LONG time.  I thought I would never get better, but I’m slowly coming around.  Not to mention the fact that I’m still healing from my knee surgery – it does NOT help when a certain four year old decides to kick it with all her might during a throw down temper tantrum, not once, but twice!  Ugh.  Then she fell on it just a few days ago.  Lovely.  Holden’s been in on it too – I was holding him on my lap and he threw his head back and hit it, yep, you guessed it, right smack dab in the middle of my knee.  Excruciating.  Now I know they’re both out to get me. ;)  I’m limping more now than I was two weeks ago.  My doctor said that I couldn’t damage it again after surgery, and it’s certainly been put to the test.  I’m not sure he’s correct, but I’m hoping for my sake that he is.  The pain has just been downright horrible. :(

I keep meaning to post, but I just crash every night after the kids go to bed.  Thankfully our little guy has been sleeping through the night for one week now and I can’t even tell you how grateful I am for that.  I’m hoping that his all night sleeps continue because it’s GREAT.  However; little guy decides that he can now crawl at rocket speed and he’s taken up climbing in the last two days.  I’ve caught him on top of boxes and step stools so far.  He’s CRAZY I tell ya’. :D  Kasen wasn’t even crawling yet, so this is new for us.  Brad said, “Well, Kasen got into EVERYTHING and so does Holden, but Holden has twice the strength.” LOL  We are in T.R.O.U.B.L.E. ;)

We had our annual Oscar party tonight with Kasen.  She got all dolled up and yes, I took pictures.  I’ll have to post them later because I just don’t have the energy to edit them and post them tonight.  However: here are some random pics that I’ve taken in the past month.  Enjoy!

P.S.  These are especially for you Gayle – a little birdie told me you had been asking!!! :D













That’s all for now. :)

See ya’ later!!


February 2, 2010

Little dude in his crib this afternoon.  The sick little guy was cooperative for about one minute, then the wailing began.  Good grief, can he ever cry.  Whew, exhausting.


Long day – Holden whining, my knee has been aching terribly all day – I’m ready for bed, but Holden is in crazy rare form.  On the other hand, Kasen was great today.  I’m super thankful for that! :)

Good night!  See ya’ later!!

I Heart Faces Photo Contest

January 18, 2010

This week’s theme for I Heart Faces is “We Are Family” and must have at least one adult in the photo.  I went in my daughter’s room one night and saw my husband with our children during story time.  I knew I needed to seize the moment on film, so I ran and grabbed my camera.  I’m so glad I did because it melts my heart every time I see this pic – knowing how special this is each and every night.  It’s one of the special times that I remember sharing with my Dad and my brother every evening. I love that my children are experiencing the same thing with their father.

“The best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few minutes of their time each day.” ~ M. Grundler

Check out all the other great entries – Click here.


See ya’ later!

Random Pics

January 13, 2010

I’ve been taking pictures everyday, but I just haven’t been posting them.  My goal is to get at least one picture a day for the year 2010.  I may not get to posting them all, but I do have them documented in a calendar elsewhere.  That way, I will have this year documented without having to do much else.  I may even make it into a scrapbook.  If you know me at all, I’m not great at follow-through, so it’s HUGE that I’m even telling you this now. ;)

Anyway, I wanted to share some of the pics I’ve taken in the last few days.

My absolutely stunning, wonderful, precious girl.


My funny, sweet, sensitive boy.


The ducklings that Kasen and I discovered at the park yesterday.  Aren’t they precious?!


Our beautiful bushes in our backyard.  I love the gorgeous red and gold colors that they turn in the fall.


That’s all for now!  See ya’ later!!

Super Cute

January 9, 2010

Yep, our little dude is super cute.  My goal was to get some good shots of Kasen and Holden together, and believe it or not, Kasen was the cooperative one! LOL Holden just wasn’t having it. He was fine as long as he had the spotlight all to himself though. ;) Sooo, I got a few great shots of Holden solo, and I’m really pleased with them.  Of course, everything goes in his mouth right now because he is teething big time.  I’m thinking one of those little suckers should pop out pretty quick.  I’m betting his top right one will be next.  We’ll see.

As for me, I’m still slowly recovering, but I’m not in as much pain this evening thank goodness.  I did have an allergic reaction to the iodine that was used in surgery and I still have a lovely rash on my leg and it’s quite itchy.  I’m hoping that will be gone soon.  Leave it to me to have something like that happen.  Oh well, like I always say, it could be worse! :)

Since I’m not adding a pic of Kasen tonight, I’ll leave you with one of our funny conversations.

Kasen: “Mommy, can you walk?”

Me: “Well, not very well yet.”

Kasen: “But you can limp, right?”

Me: “Yes, I can limp.”

Kasen: “So you can limp-walk!” LOL :)

Funny girl – I love to hear how she thinks.

Okay, here’s the dude ~


See ya’ later!!

Little Dude

January 8, 2010

These were taken with a short visit with my little dude yesterday afternoon.  Thankfully, Brad’s parents have kept the kids for us since Tuesday evening.  I don’t know what we would have done without them.  I still am not able to walk well, but I’m getting better little by little.  There is a lot of swelling, the pain is still very intense ,and now that I have some anti-nausea medicine, it’s a little better.  Before, it was a choice to feel the pain or the choice to not have pain, but to throw up instead.  Not a fun choice.  Now, I just take the pain medication along with the anti-nausea medicine, the pain subsides and I feel better for a little while, even though I can’t stay awake.  Still better than what it was.

The kids came home this evening and we had a pizza party with Kasen.  She was SO cuddly, I really missed her.  And we had a lot of fun with Holden before he went down for the night.  We’ll see how long he lasts.  It’s hard, because I know I won’t be able to get him in the middle of the night, Brad will have to get him for me.  I’ll still be able to feed him and care for him, but I can’t really carry him around just yet.  I’m already missing my independence, but I keep reminding myself that it will come with time.  Thankfully, I have a lap top so I can still use my computer while I’m laid up.

Back to the little dude ;) – I took these pics while Holden sat on the bed and visited me yesterday.  I had to capture those dreamy eyelashes and that pouty bottom lip of his – remember, that’s his trademark! LOL



h01-07-10cSee ya’ later!!